Look But Don't Touch?

Hello Divas!

So as I was lying around today fighting a nasty bug on my damn day off, I thought about a conversation I had with one of my best friends yesterday. On the topic of possible impending nuptials (more on that another time), I queried if marriage is even relevant anymore these days? Even if it is, how do you keep it together when most people can't seem to stay faithful on a Sunday?

Look, I used to be the bright-eyed romantic waiting on "the perfect man for me" to come along. Then I got married....and divorced years later. I'm not bitter, and still believe in romance and real love..etc. However, when I constantly get asked why I am single, it stings a little-I'll admit. The truth is that I AM picky and I know what I'm worth this time around.

One of the things on my wishlist (and it is long...believe me!) is that we will both be able to remain physically attractive to one another without cheating. Shoot, sex is very important, as well as chemistry. Yet, I know there are tons of hot, bootylicious women out there who are oddly attracted to married men. That notwithstanding, men are visually led as it is. Are the odds stacked against me? I asked my friend, from a male perspective what the answer is.

He stated quite simply: "A man is gonna look at anything that is pretty to him. Hell, you women look all the time. So let him look...but don't touch. As long as you have respect in your relationship, he will come home and tell you about that fine baby girl he just saw and y'all can go work it out in the bedroom."

Um. Huh? What kind of advice is that? I mean, I get we can't walk around with blinders on. I've dabbled in a little visual male appreciation myself. My question is: where does it stop? Can you truly look without touching, and is that the secret to marital/relationship longevity?

I'll have to think on that one.