Date Night

Welcome back to the madness! Hope you all are enjoying your lives and living it as honestly as can be. That's my goal everyday...it's so freeing!!! Some people may resent you for your non-conformity and brazen mentality, but so what? They'll get it eventually.

So Friday night was much fun.  Almost too much. My original plan was to stay in and get the finishing touches on my book done (Rainbow Trout is coming...I promise. Politics had me at a standstill!). However, I gave in to fun-shocking; I know...and went out with Mr. Thomas on a friend-date. You're probably thinking "big deal", but it turned out to be very revealing! Read on.

Surprisingly, we didn't take any pictures, but I'll tell you what I wore. All cruelty free fashion, of course. Use your imagination and make me look hot in your mind, because child, I was! Yep. I wore an above the knee black, fitted and strapless lace dress with black lace peep toe "shooties"... my name for ankle boots/shoes. The dress looks a lot like this one, except the lining is black, not nude, and it was fitted all the way to the bottom:

This one is by UjENA, and can be found online for as low as $38.95 I purchased mine at Vista Ridge Mall in Lewisville for about the same price.

These are the shoes that I just slipped on to take these pics. They are by Chinese Laundry and I purchased them for about $60 on sale a few months ago. They have a peep-toe front, and you might be able to see my silver toenail polish from the side. The heels are about 5 inches.

I get a lot of compliments on these babies. They are very comfortable also. LOVE them!

Accessories were minimal: brown and gold studded cuff bracelet (purchased at the mall last year-forgot the price-sorry!), smoky quartz and diamond ring (Mother's Day gift last year), and pink diamond earrings from Juicy Couture (birthday gift 2 years ago from my eldest son Mychal).

I smoothed my hair with shea butter and sweet almond oil and flat ironed it into loose waves. One beige faux-leather clutch later, I was out the door!

He greeted me with a crisp white dress shirt, dark wash jeans and a nice pair of kicks. Sexy.

Ok, so now that you're caught up on the fashion, you can get a peek into the date =)

First, we went to Pappadeaux in Dallas. As most of you know, there are NOT many vegan options on their menu! However, he was so handsome and gentlemanly that I let it slide. I had a glass of cabernet sauvignon, and he started with a mojito. It must have been good because he ordered another with his appetizer of jumbo coconut shrimp. He asked me if I "could eat shrimp" as a vegan. Here we go again. Explanation time.

Our conversation was pretty good, and a man always scores points when he tells his date how beautiful she is (even as I spotted other women looking over at us...heifers). I tried to order red beans and rice for dinner, but when I asked, alas, they prepared it with meat. I ended up ordering plain rice and zucchini ribbons, which turned out to be really delish. Somehow he was able to look me in the eye and talk about our lives while simultaneously chowing a steak, asparagus, and mashed potatoes. Talented!

I found myself wanting to stay in his company, which worked out because he said we were on to "part 2 of the night." Hmmm.

He took me to Buttons in Addison, which is a jazzy/live band bar and restaurant-type spot which is exactly what I was in the mood for. The band was singing an Earth, Wind, and Fire song as we walked in, and the place was packed...but not annoyingly packed.

.

I had been there before and had a good time. As the drinks flowed, he became a lot more open about his feelings for me...and surprised me with an amazing confession. I'll have to keep that private and see what happens =)

Unfortunately, I did openly flirt with a couple of guys who approached me while we were sitting at the bar. By openly flirt, I mean engage in conversation and lingering hand holding. Oops. Blame it on the Patron? The vodka tonics? Glasses of cab I'd had earlier? Before you boo me, I  acknowledged my lack of manners, apologized and smoothed things over with my friend-date. He said he understood that I am a social butterfly, "but that sh*t had better not happen again". Woo hoo! Loves me a strong man who will not put up with my ish. Most of the time.

There you have it. Great night and potential for more great nights? We'll see.

Until next time...

Love and Happiness,

<3 Nikki

What's in my hair???

Healthy hair on a woman (or man, for that matter) is always a beautiful thing. Usually, it becomes the topic of conversation and questions then follow about what you do to maintain it.

Plus, I promised this a while back. =/

I transitioned from chemically treated hair to natural hair back in 2008. I have always had a relaxer in my hair from about the age of 12 or so. My hair is naturally thick, coarse, and was always on the drier side growing up. It would get to shoulder length, and then break off. No one knew how to care for it, including me. Remember Dax hair grease?? Ugh!

In college, I just decided to braid it because it was easier to maintain. During those 4 years or so, I noticed as my relaxer grew out, my natural texture was gorgeous and it grew like crazy! I wished I had the knowledge back then on how to care for my natural hair, because I would have saved myself a lot of heartache in upcoming years. After I graduated, I went back to a relaxer, cut it into a fierce bob and rocked it! It was cute, but my hair started breaking again.

Finally, I decided to learn about my hair and how to take care of it. I was determined to have gorgeous locks like my Trinidadian grandmother, and like my birth mother. Although I don't really know her, the pics I saw of her showed THE most amazing Angela Davis type fro I've ever seen.

I truly have to credit girls like AFROSTORY, misskrisnew, Rusticbeauty, whoissugar, and SO many more natural girls on YouTube who taught me how to embrace, love, and grow my hair the way it was intended. Although I didn't "big chop" and start from scratch, I just trimmed the relaxed ends off as my hair grew, and within 6 months or so, I had no more relaxer left.

I LOVE my hair. I have to say that I thought I could flat iron it (of course using heat protectant) in the summer and it would stay straight. Unfortunately, the summer humidity of Atlanta laughed at that plan. Which worked out just fine because all that heat started to break it off again. Yikes!! So during the summer, I twist out or roller set, and in the cooler months I roller set and occasionally flat iron. My hair is now about 20 inches long, or armpit length (APL) when straight. I started at about ear length. If it weren't for the heat damage along my journey, my hair would definitely be at my goal of bra strap length (BSL)now 3 years later, but setbacks are good because they force you to learn what works.

Here's what I've learned:

1. LISTEN TO YOUR HAIR! Not everything someone else does for their hair will work for yours. Honey is supposed to be a natural hair girl's dream moisturizer. My hair detests it. It just gets hard and crunchy. Organic Shea Butter, sealed with sweet almond oil and/or olive oil works best for me.

2. Use very little products at one time to see what works best for you. I used to run out and buy everything under the sun to get my hair softer, longer, shinier, etc. Except I didn't know what the hell was working and what wasn't. Plus, it was a waste of money! Now I keep it pretty simple and my hair thanks me.

3. Drink lots of water, eat fresh foods, exercise, and massage your scalp. Daily. Period. It's an internal and external endeavour. You can't eat processed junk foods, live a stressful life, and be unbalanced yet expect your hair to grow just because you have a great regimen.

4. Supplements are fine for me, but I keep it at 2 only : Biotin 10mg daily (one 5,000mcg caps twice daily), and B12 tab daily since I'm vegan. That's it. I try to get the rest of my vitamins and supplements from my diet of fruits, veggies, legumes, grains, and almond milk.

5. Be patient and consistent. Natural black hair takes a lot of attention and time. I dedicate Saturday or Sunday to wash (or co-wash), deep condition, moisturize, twist, then air dry. I trim the ends every 4-6 weeks and continue to educate myself on what's best for my hair.

6. Detangle slowly, and the less heat the better. My hair is very coily and I have to detangle and be careful with heat to avoid breakage.

So here's a list of my common hair products. I also clarify every so often with an apple cider vinegar wash, and try to avoid any cones or unnatural ingredients in my hair products.


1. Sweet Almond Oil

 I buy this from The Vitamin Shoppe, $4.99
 I massage this into my scalp daily and seal the ends of my hair after a wash.

2. Tea Tree Oil

I bought mine at Walmart, about $8

I only use this once or twice per week, mixed with another oil since it is an essential oil. It has a lot of properties such as antibacterial and anti fungal. It helps unclog my hair follicles and help to stimulate growth.


3. Jamaican Black Castor Oil

I've yet to find in stores. I buy mine at Sam's Caribbean online store, 4 oz $6.99

The site claims: Tropic Isle Jamaican Black Castor Oil (JBCO) is know to cleanse toxins from the scalp, nourish and thicken the hair, stimulate hair growth, moisturize dry brittle hair, repair split ends, and give hair body and bounce.
Yessir! It has done all that for my hair. I buy the one with lavender added for better scent and the added hair growth benefits lavender is attributed with. The oil is very thick, and not much is needed. My has has grown about 1/2 inch or so per month since I've started using it. I especially massage into my hairline area which had become weak from years of tight braiding, and this oil has done wonders for it!

4. Khoret Amen Hair Smoothie

 I purchased at Carol's Daughter, along with the Khoret Amen Hair oil for $20.

I use the deep conditioner to help detangle roughly once monthly. I use the oil about 2-3 times weekly. They both have a very strong scent, but the olive oil, ylang oil, rapeseed oil and sunflower oil LOVES my hair. It defines my curls, and gives slip well.  I think it's the patchouli that gives it the strong scent, but it disappears by morning =)

5. Organic Root Stimulator Olive Oil Replenishing Conditioner

I buy this at Sally's Beauty Supply, about $5

This is my go to conditioner. It makes my hair soft as ish (ew...sorry, but it does!) and smells great. I use it for my co-washes (conditioner washes) when I don't want to use drying shampoos, and also sometimes as a deep conditioner under a plastic cap for about an hour. LOVES!

6. Aloe Vera Gel (organic)

 I buy mine at Sprouts Farmer's Market, about $4

I use this to both moisturize and tame the frizzies when I wear my twist outs in the summer.

7.  Biotin and B-12

 I buy mine at various pharmacies. I got these last at Kroger, 2 for 1 $9

I don't like to give out dosages for supplements or any meds to people because, 1. I'm a medical professional, and 2. Everyone's body responds differently. So PLEASE know that this is what works FOR ME. That being said, biotin is known to cause skin breakouts if you start off with a high dose, so start lower and see what works for you. I had to increase my dose to 10,000mcg (10mg) daily before I saw significant growth. It works for me. Beware, though...your hair growth everywhere speeds up =/

Oh, and my nails will look like claws if you aren't careful =/ 
B12 helps also with my metabolism, allowing the body to use fats, protein, and carbs to grow skin, hair and nails.

8. Nubian Heritage 98% Organic Shea Butter

 The Vitamin Shoppe, $11.49

Pure Shea butter is a gift to my hair. I massage it in daily and it keeps my hair soooo soft! Nubian Heritage has different varieties; the one I use is infused with neem oil, Haitian vetiver, and Indian hemp, as well as the Raw Shea Butter, 99%  organic. It smells amazeballs! Rub it in your palms for a bit so it can melt before you massage in.

9. Mane 'n Tail Herbal Gro Shampoo

Sally's Beauty Supply, about $5

I know, I know. It's for horses...but it works!! I only use this about 2x/month because it does contain some 'cones (way down on the ingredient list) and sodium laureth sulfate (second ingredient). However, the majority of ingredients are natural, and herbal. Plus it's tingly. I love to tingle. I'm currently on the prowl for a natural shampoo, so leave me suggestions if you have any.


10. My hair on wash day! :D

Just wanted to show the texture of my hair as it has grown out over the years. This is 100% natural texture without any chemicals.

 Conditioned and sectioned off in twists. Sexxxy, lol!

Combed out, flat ironed and curled =)




Well, there it is...my hair regimen and journey so far. I'm happy with my progress and my goal for next year is at least 6 inches of growth. At a 1/2 inch per month, that's pretty realistic. I'll show you guys my progress in June 2012!! Let's goooo!

Love & Happiness,

Nikki