Showing posts with label emotional growth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotional growth. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Emotionally Raw...20 Days

Back again, my lovelies to update you on this raw journey of mine. Are you all well? Good! I've got lots to share so let's get to it. Days 16-20 were a roller coaster, but I held on!


Days 16-20

Day 16 was like a gift from the perfect life fairy. I kid you not. Tuesday is usually a good day for me. Don't know why. I don't question it, I just ride the wave. Ha! I woke up feeling so clear headed and light inside. Very energetic. Still congested and "sneezy" since my arch enemy pollen was lingering around like an unwelcome house guest. I had resumed my intense workouts in the past few days and was about to do a kickboxing class, when my fiance said he wanted to "go shopping". Screeech! This from the king of frugal?! I quickly ate 2 bananas for breakfast, along with 2 cups of water. I also take water with me wherever I go. After shopping (he bought me 2 GORGEOUS summer dresses!), we went to lunch at Macaroni Grill in Marietta. I had a really great HUGE house salad and water with lemon. I was hungry by dinner time, so I had lots of fruit and raw nuts-I find that helps with any cravings. Grapes, blueberries, bananas, raw cashews & peanuts, and pineapple. I also had a cup of herbal tea before bed. Still sleeping well with vivid dreams, 6-7 hours/night.


My lunch salad at Macaroni Grill


Day 17 found me with a ton of energy, but not much of an appetite. Boooo!
I only had a small breakfast of 6-8 Medjool dates (I swear they taste like candy) and that was it. About 2 or so hours later, I had a banana and herbal tea for a snack. Lunch was a smoothie made with oranges, pineapples, and bananas. Dinner was a big veggie salad made with red leaf kale, carrots, avocado, onions, raisins, and spinach. Going to the bathroom is now my most frequent past time =\
I'm also noticing that I am always burping or gassy (not stinky tho! That's another plus to this whole raw thing). Morning breath is also waaay less offensive! Almost non-existent. I said almost. Skin is soft and clear. Wish my allergies would disappear.

Day 18 was quite interesting. I woke up feeling pretty good. Worked out first thing (kickboxing and some yoga), and had a deeelicious Berry Banana Smoothie for breakfast. Snack was a handful of raw pumpkin seeds and 2 Medjool dates. Drank lots of water this morning, about 4 cups already. The day was uneventful until about 1 or 2 pm. I began feeling very anxious and wasn't sure why. I used to suffer from panic attacks, and it almost felt like the beginning of a panic attack which was very concerning. I also started to feel very tired physically and mentally. I don't know if I was having an emotional detox ( I talk about this in my first "raw" video), but it was not fun. I went on to eat a couple of oranges and bananas at work and drank about 4-5 more cups of water for the day, not including 2 cups of herbal tea. I didn't eat my salad for dinner.

Berry Banana Smoothie:
1 med-large frozen banana
1/4 cup frozen blueberries
1/2 cup strawberries
1/2 cup pineapple chunks w/juice
3/4 cup frozen peaches
Blend!


Day 19 had me feeling a little better, but still emotionally flat.Wth? I wanted something crunchy with my breakfast so I had raw cashews and a fruit salad. I have to say my taste buds appreciate food in its natural state now. I can actually taste the flavors of each food I eat without having to season it or drown it in sauces or dressings. I was off from work that Friday, and slept most of the early part of the day. Maybe I just needed some rest because I woke up and had a smoothie my fiance made for me and went back to sleep for the night!

Day 20 Hallelujah. Woke up feeling like my fabulous self again! Lol. My energy was back. I jumped out of bed, but not before reminiscing on the dream I had about being married to Lil Wayne and...well, never mind. I've lost about 8-10 pounds so far for those who are asking. I didn't really weigh in on the first day, so yeah. I had a green smoothie for breakfast (spinach, kale, 1 banana, and pineapple). So good. I caught up with my best friend on the phone, talked with another girlfriend, went to the nail salon, and then shopping for the 80's Throwback party my fiance and I were invited to that night. Somewhere in there I fit in a mango and 2 bananas for lunch, 4 cups of water, and 2 nori rolls with lettuce and avocado for dinner. The party had an open bar, and this was the first time in recent memory that I partied while drinking only water all night...and had a blast!!! Go figure. Btw, I was Jody Watley and he was a B-boy =)

Nikki "Watley" wearing the fiance's B-boy glasses

MC Roc in the house!


There you have it...my crazy emotional detox days. I'm thankful for them, though because it means I've let go of whatever was buried deep down unbeknownst to me. I'm currently on day 24 and am almost sad this is coming to a close. I do miss rice and beans, and hummus, to be quite honest. Other than that, I feel amazing. We'll see what happens! Thanks for hanging with me again. Be well.


Love and Happiness,

Nikki

 

Monday, October 17, 2011

This or That?

I am coming off of a fabulous weekend filled with promise of new beginnings and second chances.
Fabulous...wonderful...hallelujah!
So why am I pissed off?
I learned long ago that just because good things are happening for you, not everyone will share in your happiness. Cool. Understandable. People can be selfish, unhappy haters. It happens everyday.
However, when someone you don't even KNOW crosses the line and sends you a message spewing hatred, jealousy, and ill will-I get tripped up a bit. How can your life be so miserable and meaningless that you would spend so much time concocting an unsatisfying breakfast of ignorance? Did it change your misery when you hit "send"?
Now, I am very far from the chick from Brooklyn who would have immediately retaliated to that email. She would have rang the alarm and the troops would have been sent into Operation Beat Down. Yet, that same chick knocked on the door and asked if she was needed for a split second.
Years of yoga and meditation, running and vegetarianism has thankfully somewhat diminshed the fireball temper I was born with.
So what was the best way to resolve this situation that I felt was a test of my emotional growth? Zen chick or Brooklyn chick? This or that?
I decided that I am a sum of my parts. I refuse to squelch all of the lessons that Brooklyn chick taught me: be smart, be strong, be cautious, be unafraid of anyone, be who you are. Yet I welcome the new lessons that Zen chick has blessed my life with: choose your battles, fools rush in, don't overreact, love yourself so you can love others, you create your own situation, and....BREATHE.
As I (somewhat) politely responded that she didn't know me and to please stay out of my effin life, it was good enough for me. Even as the ignorance and drama poured forth afterwards, I took a deep breath...deleted...and moved on with my life.
I can't and will not react to every negative person who crosses my path. THIS I do know.